Mommy! Daddy!
by Madrigal-in-training
Summary: Honey's mom and dad go one a cruise so who does he get to fill in? Mori and Haruhi of course! Now let's see what the rich brats think about it... Reviews appreciated! TEMPORARY HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One: Honey's Dilemma

It was your average, typical, ridiculously rich day at the Host Club. Tamaki was dancing around, flowers in his hand, Hikaru and Kaoru were planning a prank on Nekozawa (something about solar power) and Kyoya was calculating the finances for their next major outing. And Haruhi of course was going around and getting tea ready for the first Hosting day back from spring break.

The young girl had her Hosting suit on despite the fact that it was no found out she was a girl. Actually, a few girls saw her change a couple days back and since then, well, it's kind of hard to keep a secret when two of the major gossip girls watched your transformation from a boy to a girl. The school took it surprisingly well considering, and Haruhi was still allowed to stay as a Host. A female Host to be exact to help any girls from a "natural perspective" as Kyoya had said.

Really, he just wanted her debt paid back in full.

With the news out though, Haruhi was allowed to grow out her hair, even if it would never be as long as before. It went a bit past her shoulders in long, tousled sheets, silken and a dark shade of ebony. Other than those small changes though, Fujioka Haruhi and the Host Club were still their usual selves.

Until Mori came in, carrying a crying Honey in his shoulders. The small Lolita was adorable under the worst of circumstances and this was no exception. Despite his red puffy eyes and small, down turned frown, or perhaps because of it, he was still the sweetest person in this room.

"Honey-sempai, what's wrong?" Hikaru asked in alarm as they saw the still wet tear tracks on the boy's face, "Who's but are we kicking?"

"What he means to say is," Kaoru interrupted, giving his twin a dark look, "Is who did this to you? Where can we find him? And how do you want him dead?"

"It's okay," Honey whimpered as Mori gently put him down. He made a valiant attempt to wipe the tears off his face.

"No, it's not," Haruhi disagreed, crouching to her knees and opening her arms for a hug, "Tell me what's wrong."

With a wail of "Haruhi!" the small boy propelled himself in the natural Host's arms, sobbing into her uniform as she tried to comfort him. By making soft little hushing noises and soothing circles in his back, Honey soon calmed down.

"Now tell us what's wrong," Kyoya commanded, putting his phone away, "As the twins so artfully said; who shall we sic rabid dogs on?" Haruhi turned to glare at him.

"Is this really the only options you rich kids can take?" Haruhi asked in exasperation.

Kaoru shrugged and replied, "Well, there's always bankruptcy but it's not nearly half as much fun as the rabid dogs."

"Now tell us, little one, what's wrong?" Tamaki interrupted gently, "Tamaki will make it all better, I promise!"

"My parents are leaving for the month to go on a cruise," Honey wailed, "And they won't take me too! I need my parents and I have none! Who'll tuck me in at night? Who'll read me a bedtime story?"

"That's okay Honey," Tamaki consoled, beaming at him as he suddenly got a bright idea, "We'll be your parents until your real ones return!"

"Really?" Honey smiled, looking at the club hopefully. The rest of them didn't look all that keen with the idea but then again, _you _try saying no to Honinokuza Mitskuni.

"Why not?" Tamaki asked, "I here these commoners have made up a way to have two sets of parents. It's called getting godparents!"

"You mean the commoners are really so poor, they can't take care of their own children?" Hikaru gasped. Tamaki nodded fervently.

"Yes, its pure genius!" he said, "You shall have another set of parents, Honey-sempai!"

"Well, I suppose a couple in the Host Club will allow more guests to come in," Kyoya allowed.

"A COUPLE?" the twins and Tamaki both shouted.

"Well, yes," Kyoya admitted, pushing his glasses up his nose, "A set of parents is generally a couple and I suppose it would excite the guests, even with two of our members missing. Naturally, Haruhi will have to be the mother; she _is_ the only girl after all… why are you three looking at me like that?"

"You, Kyoya," Tamaki said, grinning, "Are a genius."

"Well, of course I am," he looked affronted, "It took you people that long to notice?"

"So that means I have to be Honey's father!" Hikaru claimed.

"No way," Kaoru disagreed, "I deserve to be Honey's father! He needs someone sweet and supportive to be with him!" Mori and Kyoya both watched this in amusement.

"Your both wrong," Tamaki confided, "I'm Honey-sempai's favorite! So I'll be his father!"

"Right so Haruhi's my mother," Honey said, completely ignoring the three idiots, "And my father must be…"

"Who?" Tamaki asked eagerly, the twins nodding behind him.

"…Takashi," Honey announced proudly.

"WHAT?"

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_**This is the first of a many chapter story regarding Mori and Haruhi. It'll be funny, romantic and downright weird at times to please review. I want to dedicate this story to my best friend, AnimeFreakLover123 who may or may not be stalking Mori through many anime shows and fanfiction. **_


	2. Hosting Day

Chapter Two: Hosting Day

"Takashi's the father?" Hikaru repeated, incredulously, "Why Takashi?"

"Well, isn't it obvious?" Kyoya said and everyone turned to see that he was already opening his laptop and typing something down, "The best pairing for the natural type would be the strong, silent type to offer unconditional support and nonjudgmental views. Besides Haruhi's petite frame and pale complexion will match perfectly with Mori's height and silent power."

"I just wanted Haruhi and Takashi as my parents," Honey added in helpfully, "But what he says too."

"But Mori can't be the father!" Tamaki wailed, "I don't want my precious daughter to marry him!" The twins looked at him in disgust.

"Oh, but you're ready to marry her?" Hikaru demanded.

"Pedophile," Kaoru sighed, "Never knew you had it in you, boss."

"I'm not a pedophile," Tamaki sulked, "I don't stalk children!"

"Sure you don't," Hikaru said, nodding, "Honestly Tono, first Haruhi, what's next, sweet, little Honey?" Their gazes turned accusing.

"I don't stalk children," Tamaki sobbed, "I don't!" And to the mushroom corner he goes.

"Really," Kyoya sighed, looking at the twins, "At this rate, we'll need to hire a professional landscaper to deal with Tamaki's fungi problems. Not to mention a therapist for his pedophile tendencies. Can't you two leave him alone? It's wasting me money." Shrugs were his answer.

"It might not be so bad Takashi," Haruhi said, smiling up at the still in shock Morinokuza, "It might even be fun!"

"Better than if I ended up with Tamaki I guess," he mused, making the girl smile.

"Oh, I don't know," Haruhi teased, "You and Tamaki might make a lovely couple! You just need to give him a chance."

"I'll consider that," he replied, laughing before the stares of the rest of the Host Club made them look up. The twins looked shocked, Tamaki horrified, Honey was beaming and Kyoya looked like he wanted to smile. Or maybe it was just the idea of a bigger profit that was making him grin.

"Now as amusing as it is seeing you two… bond," Kyoya interrupted, checking his watch, "We will have guests arriving in minutes. Everyone to their stations! Haruhi, you'll be sitting with Mori and Honey today."

"_If Kyoya wasn't so busy__ overtaking companies_," Haruhi thought silently, "_He'd make a wonderful general. Or maybe a ruthless torturer." _

Outside though, she just nodded and followed the two boys over to their usual seating arrangement which was placed next to an assortment of cakes and cookies and cupcakes and other sugary treats. Soon the girls had filtered in and a bunch of them were surrounding the three Hosts.

"Why are you all sitting here together, Haruhi?" a shy, young girl with dark raven-black hair asked. Haruhi gave her an easy smile to reassure her and she immediately smiled back.

"Haru-chan is my new Mommy!" Honey informed her gleefully, bouncing up and down on his seat as he took a bite of his cake, "And Takashi's my new Daddy!"

"Aw," the girls all cooed and one girl even exclaimed, "That's so cute!" Haruhi had to admit, the way Honey spin it really did make it look absolutely adorable. Her new son was more cunning than he seemed.

"Why are they your new parents Honey?" another girl asked as her friends giggled behind her.

"My real parents are on a cruise," Honey informed her, "So Mommy and Daddy will fill in!"

"Aw, that's so sweet," the first girl said again, "And Haruhi and Mori make _such_ a cute couple!"

"Oh, we're not a couple," Haruhi said quickly, feeling her face turn a deep red. A quick glance to Mori showed that his face was blushing too.

"You're right Haruhi!" one of the girls exclaimed, "If you're parents than you must already be married! So they can't say you're a couple if you're already together!"

"_How did we get from dating to marriage so fast?"_ Haruhi thought in bemusement, "_And what's wrong with these rich kids? I'm fifteen! And they already decided I'm married?"_

"How was it when Honey was born, Haruhi?" a second year asked in concern, "Was the pregnancy very hard?"

"_Those kids are delusional_," Haruhi realized, "_You'd think they noticed that Honey's _older_ than I am!"_ She was considering how to set the situation straight when Honey chose to make it even worse.

"Kiss!" he demanded, bouncing on the seat, "Kiss Mommy, Daddy! _Now!_" The girls all squealed excitedly in agreement.

"You want me to what?" Mori asked, looking at Honey in clear disbelief, "Now Mitskuni… I really don't think… well…" He was blushing as he let the sentence hang on.

"Mommy and Daddy kiss all the time," Honey pouted, looking absolutely adorable, "You and Haru-chan have to do it too!"

"Now Mitskuni," Mori warned before a reddening Haruhi interrupted.

"It's okay," she stammered, "It's just a friendly peck on the cheek right?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever you want," Honey answered quickly, before giving them an angelic smile, "So you'll kiss now?"

"Why not?" Haruhi smiled and leaned in to place a chaste kiss to his cheek. When Honey 'accidentally' pushed her though, she ended up pressing her lips to his, Mori's arm coming up to steady her.

For a minute neither of them moved, too caught up in the shock of it before a tell-tale flash alerted them to the rest of the room. They practically jumped apart and Haruhi turned to see Kyoya, a camera in one hand and a photo that he was waving in the other.

"Now who would like to own the original photo of Ouran's most coveted couple and their first kiss?" Kyoya waved the snapshot in the air, "This is a once in a lifetime chance, ladies. You'll never get it again. Bidding starts at ten million yen. Do I have a higher offer?"

Haruhi was studiously avoiding Mori's gaze, especially as she tried to resist bringing her hand to her lips. An odd thought was bouncing through her head. That kiss… it was kind of nice. When Mori spoke however, she couldn't help but look.

"Can you believe him?" Mori asked laughter in his voice as he nodded at Kyoya. She turned to see that the 'cool' Host was currently auctioning off her baby pictures- how did he get his hands on those?- to a group of exited girls.

"That's Kyoya for you," she sighed, "Next thing you know, he'll give out my former homework papers." At the weird look on Mori's face, she groaned. "He didn't."

"He's Kyoya," was all Mori offered.

"I'm hungry Mommy, feed me?" Honey pouted, looking up at her with a pleading gaze. Haruhi smiled and picked up a small spoon before she started feeding the small boy cake. The girls all oohed and ahhed at the adorable picture and Honey announced.

"Daddy's hungry too Mommy," Honey chirped, "You should feed him some cake!" Really, the Honinozuka heir was enjoying this far too much.

"That's okay, I'm not very hungry," Mori said, looking embarrassed.

"Oh, come on Mori, open up," Haruhi said playfully, giving him a wide smile. Mori reluctantly smiled back at her. He was suddenly very grateful that the other groups were all too busy hosting to watch them.

"Takashi," he replied, smiling, "Only if you call me Takashi."

"Okay then, Takashi," she agreed, "Hope you like strawberry cake." She brought the small spoon and let Takashi eat from it, both of them oblivious to the sighs from the girls or Honey's smug expression. The rest of the day passed with little change, and when hosting was over, Haruhi quickly stood up and left after giving Mori and Honey an easy good bye.

But the scene replayed in her head the rest of the day, even as she did chores or washed the dishes. Her father seemed to sense that and smiled secretly before telling her to go to bed early. But even in bed she kept seeing Mori's intense gaze, his rare, sudden smiles, the easy way she could smile back, knowing he never demanded anything more than what she was willing to give… Haruhi was really looking forward to tomorrow.

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_**Review people and I'll post the next chapter. Also, I don't own Ouran High School Host Club or the characters. **_


	3. The Picnic Part One

Chapter One: Honey's New Parents

Chapter Three: The Picnic- Part One

Haruhi woke up to fresh sunlight and chirping birds, but all her mind seemed to be focusing on was getting to school and seeing Takashi… err, the _Host Club_. Going to school and seeing the Host Club. She tried not to pay any attention to her outfit but couldn't help just running a comb through her curls at least once. Or twice. Or five times but who was counting?

The second she stepped through the school gates though, Haruhi found herself instantly swarmed. Girls she never even spoke to, suddenly surrounded her, all jabbering on excitedly for several minutes before Haruhi could finally understand what they were talking about.

"Oh, Haruhi!" one random girl, exclaimed, "I heard about you and Mori-sempai and I think it's just so _sweet._ I'm supporting you completely!" Haruhi just looked at her in confusion.

"And Honey's just the cutest son ever!" the president of the third year class- Hadihi Rakinaga- added and lowered her voice conspiratorially, "So how big is it? You know, Mori's."

"Um… I wouldn't know," Haruhi stammered blushing, "I've never seen it." Instantly, gasps rang around her.

"You mean, he's not Mori's?" Hadihi whispered, "Than who's?"

"It must be Tamaki-sempai," another girl answered, "They both have blond hair!" All the girls nodded in agreement.

"Don't worry Haruhi," Hadihi said comfortingly, "We won't tell."

"You won't tell what?" Haruhi said incredulously, "What are you talking about Hadihi?" The older girl looked at her knowingly.

"That Honey's your illegitimate love child of course," another wide eyed girl replied seriously, "We'll keep your secret."

"You have to be kidding me," Haruhi thought, "I don't even want to _know_ where_ that_ conclusion came from."

"But do you think Mori knows?" another girl asked.

"He must," Hadihi answered, "Isn't it just so sweet that he wants to stay with Haruhi anyway? It's true love." The girls all sighed in pure bliss while Haruhi looked equal parts amused and horrified.

"Excuse me ladies," a deep voice interrupted and Haruhi turned around, relieved to find Takashi coming up to them, "But I need to borrow Haruhi for a minute." The girls all started to giggle as Takashi smiled at her.

"Thank you so much," Haruhi sighed, relieved once they were far away from the girls and walking toward Honey, "How much did you hear?" He looked at her in curiosity.

"Not much, really," he answered, "What did they say?"

"Oh, nothing important," Haruhi smiled back, mentally thanking each and every god that could have kept Mori from listening in. Or arriving just two minutes earlier. Now, that could have been a disaster.

"Mommy!" Honey shouted exuberantly, practically running into Haruhi for a hug, "You're here!

"Where else would I be, Honey-sempai?" Haruhi smiled, "And it's good to see you too."

Honey brought his face up and beamed at her, "You shouldn't call me Honey-sempai, Mommy! Not when I'm your son."

"Okay Honey," she agreed, seeing his point, "Are you and Usa-chan ready for school?"

"Yup," he answered proudly, holding up his customary pink bunny, "And my chef packed lunch for all of us! So you have to have a picnic with us after school Haruhi!"

"I don't know…" Haruhi frowned, "It'll be really late afterward and I don't like walking home in the night…"

"We'll drive you," Honey cajoled, giving her his best smile, "Actually I think we should drive you to and from school from now on."

"I agree," Takashi added, "It's not safe for you to wander around so late like you do."

Haruhi nodded but before she was able to reply, another voice called Honey's name. She turned around to see, Honey's younger brother, a slender boy with dark brown hair and an annoyed expression on his face, walk up to them. Suddenly he flipped onto the floor and sent a high kick toward Honey, which was quickly dodged.

"Honey- you idiot," he gasped, sending a flurry of punches at his younger brother, "What the hell is going on?"

"What are you talking about Chika?" Honey demanded, blocking his brother's fist and sending him spinning to the wall.

"The rumors around school of course," Chika answered, jumping against the wall and sending a fist toward Honey's nose which was immediately thrown back as he found himself pinned on the floor, "Why is everyone asking me about my new 'mommy'?"

"Haruhi's pretending to be our mom," Honey explained, breathing heavily as he jumped up from his younger brother, "Oh, and Takashi's our dad."

"Haruhi?" Chika repeated in disbelief, "The girl Host who's _younger_ than you is our mother?"

"And Takashi's our father, yes," Honey admitted, giving his brother a knowing look, "They'll be play acting as our parents to raise the Club's popularity while mom and dad are on a cruise."

"But-" Chika protested, still looking confused before Honey reached up and whispered something in his ear, "_Oh._ So Haruhi's our new mom than."

He turned around and seemed to notice them there for the first time. To Haruhi's instant surprise, he actually came up and hugged her. Whatever Honey had said to him must have struck a nerve.

"Hey, mom," Chika greeted, smiling as he turned to nod as Takashi, "Hi dad. Good to see you. Can we send Honey to obedience school?" He ignored Honey's indignant shout of, "Why me!"

"He probably needs it," Haruhi admitted, "But we aren't going to send your brother to obedience school. It's good to see you too Chika."

"So you're going to pretend to be our son too?" Takashi asked in interest, "Why?"

Chika shrugged and said, "Why not? It might be fun? Now about the obedience school…"

"No," Haruhi said firmly, "Honey stays where he is. No arguments." Chika looked stunned.

"Wow, you really do act like a mother," he grinned, "Okay then, but I'm telling you, I know a lot of good boarding schools."

"We'll keep that in mind," Takashi answered, smiling as Chika turned to leave, "Where are you going?"

"To the dojo," he called over his shoulder, "But don't worry. I'll be there for the family picnic!"

"We're having a family picnic?" Takashi asked to no on in particular.

"Of course we are," Honey chirped, "I told Ranka about it already but he couldn't come and your parents are busy Takashi; although I think they laughed a lot when I told them I was your son. Satoshi agreed to come though. Something about an opportunity he can't miss."

Takashi groaned, "You have to be kidding me. You told Satoshi too?"

"Satoshi?" Haruhi asked in interest, "That's your brother right?"

"Yes, and he undoubtedly finds this to be hilarious or he wouldn't come. I'm just warning you ahead of time; I'm pretty sure he's adopted," Takashi warned.

Haruhi laughed. "I'll keep that in mind," she said and then looked concerned, "Do we have enough food for all of us?"

"I told my chef to pack five picnic baskets," Honey answered, smiling.

"One for each of us," Haruhi said, looking shocked.

"Don't be silly mom," Honey answered, looking scandalized, "Four for my sweets and the fifth for everyone else."

"Don't you have excellent planning abilities," Haruhi laughed as the bell rang, "I should go. Have fun Honey."

"Okay Mommy," Honey answered, waving at her, "You too!"

The rest of the day passed pretty normally with Haruhi being mobbed before, after and between classes by rich kids demanding to know what was going on with Ouran's hottest couple of course. When Haruhi finally escaped them, it was time to go to the host Club and so she made her way to the third floor music room, only to find an irritated Kyoya pacing the floors.

"Haruhi," he demanded, the minute she came in, "What is the meaning of all this?"

"The meaning of all what?" Haruhi asked, not really paying attention as she waved to her 'son' and took a seat beside Takashi.

"The current rumors," Kyoya said in dissatisfaction, flipping through his notepad, "Are that Honey is yours and Tamaki's illegitimate love child, Renge is his evil nanny, the twins are the powerful sex slaves slash assistants that betrayed me and stole Honey away to the star prince Tamaki and I'm some evil, greedy businessman who forced you to marry Mori, who's the innocent lord under a magic spell that loves you despite the cruelty potion that I supposedly forced on him so he could impregnate you and I could steal the Suo family fortune!"

"Wow, you people are really imaginative," Haruhi said, genuinely impressed, "Although the evil, greedy businessman isn't that far off the mark Kyoya."

"I am neither evil nor am I greedy," he retorted, "But that's not the point! Who spread all of these rumors? They're bad for business."

"Not greedy, huh?" Haruhi asked and then shrugged, "I certainly didn't say it."

"Hikaru, Kaoru," Kyoya said, gritting his teeth, "What did you do?"

"It was a harmless joke," Hikaru protested, "We didn't think they'd believe it!"

"Besides Tamaki's the one who insisted on naming himself the star prince," Kaoru pointed out, gesturing to the Host King who was currently trying to tiptoe his way out of the room.

"Tamaki," Kyoya warned a dark look in his eyes that made the Suo heir gulp in fear.

"Kyoya," he greeted weakly, "Don't be mad. It was just a harmless joke like Hikaru said… why do you have that murderous look in your eyes? I have life insurance you know…"

"So are we going to continue the Host Club today or not?" Haruhi asked quickly, trying to turn Kyoya's attention away from the terrified Suo heir. The businessman used two fingers to push the metal rims of his glasses upward.

"Because of these rumors," he said in annoyance, "It would be best to skip Host Club for the time being until they blow over. Today, we'll be canceling Host Club." He glared at Tamaki.

"Have you ever noticed, Kyoya, that you have a twitch in your left eye?" Hikaru asked.

"That's a known sign of stress disorders, you know," Kaoru mused, "Are you okay sempai?" Both twins gulped, and recoiled in fear as Kyoya turned his death glare on them instead. As the two twins fled for their lives, Hikaru still suggesting doctor treatments for Kyoya, the small, newly formed Host family decided to slowly edge out of the room.

"Why is no body in this school sane?" Haruhi asked to no one in particular as she, Mori, and their 'son' left the enraged sempai behind. She didn't expect an answer but Honey gave her one anyway.

"Hmm?" Honey asked innocently, "Why would we need to be sane when we're rich enough to have other people be sane for us? It's the same thing as being smart mommy, if you have the right amount of yen than you should pay someone else to do the thinking for you. That's why rich people have so many scientists on their payroll."

"You must be joking," Haruhi replied, wide-eyed, "You _pay_ people to think for you?"

"And get the credit afterwards, yes," Honey agreed. At Haruhi's darkening face he quickly added, "Well not us! It's just a common practice among rich kids is what I meant… Please don't kill me! I'm too cute and evil to die!" He set a pleading look to Mori which was only answered with a half suppressed smile.

"I'm not going to kill you Honey," she sighed and then quirked her mouth upward, "Too cute and evil, huh?" Honey shrugged in answer.

"Every adorable boy needs a hobby," he said, "Mine just happens to be world domination."

"What's Chika's then?" Haruhi said, fighting a smile as they exited the building and started walking outside. The bright afternoon light brought out the strands of dark gold in her hair.

"Chika's is moaning about my lack of weight and eating habits," Honey said matter-of-factly, "Tamaki's is stalking you and Kyoya's is managing the Host Club."

"Why am I not surprised," Haruhi said, shaking her head as she suddenly noticed the black stretch limo they were walking to, "What's that car for?" Honey gave her a brilliant grin.

"For our family picnic, mommy," he chirped, grabbing her hand and pulling her toward the plush limo. Haruhi gave a yelp as she suddenly found herself pulled forward in the strong but soft grip of her son with an amused Mori watching the scene from behind.

"Family picnic?" Haruhi got out, bringing her heels down on the floor to steady herself.

"Don't you remember?" Honey pouted, "You promised to go on one with us after school. We have to go pick up Chika now!" The look on his mommy's face showed that she clearly did forget the picnic.

"But I have to go home; my dad might be worried," she frowned, as she suddenly recalled her promise.

"It's alright; Kyoya already arranged it for us," Mori said reassuringly, making a mental note to thank the cynical yet thoughtful Host, "Ranka said to have fun and be home before dark."

"Well, in that case," Haruhi hesitated, and Honey, seeing his chance, quickly pressed the point, "Mommy, we _need_ to go! You promised! You don't want to disappoint your only son, your flesh and blood, and the child of your dreams, do you?"

Haruhi was laughing at the end of his dramatic, Tamaki-style speech but she'd relaxed and Honey knew he'd won this battle. She turned to open the door, only to find that it was already opened for her, Mori standing beside the door with a small smile on his face.

"Thank you," she said quietly, smiling at him. He nodded in reply as all three got in and the car began to drive.

"So child of my dreams," Haruhi teased, "Are you sure you're the only one? There's always Chika, you know." Honey waved his hand dismissively in the air.

"But I'm still your favorite," he answered, smiling winningly, "Right Takashi?"

"I don't know," Mori said thoughtfully, "I always did like Chika's high kick…" Honey pouted, much to his parent's amusement.

"Shows what you know," he answered, indignantly, "You two wouldn't know quality if it smacked you over the head! I'm the perfect son! I'm small and sweet and angelic and-"

"And diabolical, and spoiled and possibly an evil mastermind," Haruhi finished and then smiled "Don't look so down Honey. We love you; you know that." Mori nodded from beside her.

"I'm impossible not to love," Honey added proudly, his good humor restored as the car smoothly came to a stop.

Mori nodded sagely. "It's the modesty," he informed Honey, "We love you because you're so modest." Haruhi tried to hold back a smile; but Honey seemed to take it literally.

"Exactly," he exclaimed, like he was delighted that they'd _finally_ figured it out, "No body ever remembers my modesty! I mean here I am, being so nice and sweet and everybody overlooks it!"

"Don't worry," Mori whispered to her, "Honey's nearly always delusional; his doctor isn't disturbed by it that much. He reckons we should just go with it and it'll be fine."

"Good to know," Haruhi said, smiling as they stepped out of the car and followed an exuberant Honey down the path.

"Chika!" Honey exclaimed, bouncing into the studio, in the middle of the practice. His brother, who was fighting another martial arts master, quickly turned so he could throw several shurikans at his brother. Honey dodged and grabbed his leg, using it as leverage to jump into the air so he could drive his fist into Chika's nose.

The dark haired boy dodged it, the edge barely grazing his face as he grabbed Honey's small, slender hand and threw him toward the wall. The martial arts master just stood there, watching with awe as the two Honinozuka brothers attacked each other with a ferocity and glee that was as inspiring as it was disturbing.

Haruhi watched it all, feeling a rather sharp intake of breath as one of Chika's punches landed a bit too close to Honey's ear for her liking. There was a constricted feeling on her chest that she couldn't identify at first but then found, to her surprise, it was concern and anger. She was so unused to caring about another person's safety other than her father after her mother's death that this came as a surprise.

She was _worried_ about them. Both Chika and Honey who attacked each other with no regard for their own safety. She wanted to jump in the battle, grab them both, shake them and hug them at the same time, demand why they were so stupid…

She wanted them to be safe.

'They won't injure each other too badly," Mori said quietly and Haruhi was surprised to find that he had a hand wrapped around her wrist, clutching it firmly to keep her from getting into the fight. He looked at her in understanding and added, "I know it hurts at first but they do care about each other. They'll be fine."

'I know," she said, her eyes still on the boys, "But I can't help but worry." Mori smiled at her, feeling a surprising amount of affection for the young girl.

"You sound like a mother," he said quietly, a small note of approval hidden in his tone.

She turned to smile at him, a wistful smile, "I think I'm enjoying being one. I never knew it would be so hard or so rewarding. I… I wonder if this is how my mother felt. Always so happy and worried and proud and angry at the same time… like you were the luckiest person on Earth and were just seconds away from loosing your mind and strangling them."

"Honey has that effect on people," Mori remarked dryly and smiled at her, "You'll make a wonderful mother." He blushed as soon as he realized what he said and saw that Haruhi's face was red too.

"Thank you," she said softly; wondering at the joy and wonder that sentence brought her.

They both stood there, unsure of what to do or say next. It would probably have led on to an awkward silence had Honey not chosen to exclaim at that time, "I win!" They both turned to see that Chika was groaning on the floor with Honey sitting on top of his back as he grinned at them.

"Now we have to go the picnic!"


	4. Ouran's Newsletter

**Chapter Four: Ouran Newsletter**

**Written, produced, edited and financed by Kyoya Enterprises. We are under no obligation to report the relative accuracy of this newspaper. No Refunds.**

**Twice the Trouble by Kyoya Ootori**

**As the spring semester blooms across Ouran, our resident troublemakers, (also members of the Host Club. Pictures provided below) the Hitachiin twins, have pulled their legendary monthly prank. This prank consisted of getting a hundred or so cherry blossoms, painting them ink black and floating them to the ground in front of the most superstitious teacher at Ouran, Mr. Hikamaru, as a sign of the approaching apocalypse. **

**An excerpt from the _Signs that Signal the End of the Known World as we know it_: **

"…**_yet all great thinkers have agreed. The end of the world, the eve of the apocalypse will be signaled by the raven blossoms of the Lady Sakura. A pure darkness, an innocence crippled into those of a dark spirit's own shriveled heart, they shall fall, omens of the night and approaching terror…" _**

**As Mr. Hikamaru was sobbing for mercy, witnesses gleefully report hearing him confessing cheating on his wife of all things; the twins took advantage of this distraction by sneaking into class. As Hikaru drew terrible fake symbols on the wall with 'blood' (at least now we know why he quit art) Kaoru began attaching a tiny speaker system to the wall. Banshee wailing (or possibly Renge's singing. Either one) started as Mr. Hikamaru ran into the classroom and caused him to faint. **

**If you don't have any world government homework to hand in now, you know who to thank. **

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**Scandal for the Hosts by Renge**

**We all know the day when the Host Club's natural and strong, silent type got together. No doubt all of us also saw the true love between them, the quiet assuredness of happy bliss. Alas, it was not to be. **

**A little known fact about Ouran's longest, coveted couple (They've been idolized for over 36 hours!) is that their sons, Mitskuni and Chika Honinozuka, were illegitimate. As shown by Mitskuni Honinozuka's distinctive, golden blond hair, they're actually Tamaki-sempai's, aka the star Prince's, only children! One can only wonder how long Haruhi Fujioka had been cheating on her husband. Some even speak in hushed whispers of divorce. We, as the readers, wait with bated breath for the next twist in this complex love triangle. **

**(Personal interviews with Honey, Chika, and Tamaki have been provided) **

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**Ad for the Ouran Newsletter**

**Now, all of you are aware of Haruhi's shocking discovery. But did you know about…**

**Mori's Reaction to his Wife's Revelation? **

**How the Children Feel About Being Betrayed? **

**The Family Fight… is divorce on the way? **

**All these answers and more can be found in "The Ouran Newsletter", the unofficial paper for all things related to the Hosts. This ad has been funded by Kyoya Enterprises. Kyoya Enterprises is the sole financial manager of the Host Club. **

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**Trouble in Paradise by Renge**

**Now you can imagine that when Mori found out about the true origin of his children, he was shocked. Who wouldn't be? Well, maybe except for Kyoya-sempai because he'd have gone through a huge, very detailed background check involving the person's family life, finances, contacts, contractions, etc. before he'd even _consider _falling in love with them but he'd weird. So anyone else…**

**Yet Mori, being the kind, considerate man he was, not only forgave his wife for being unfaithful but stayed with her! The children, of course, are still horrified and scarred for life but this young family may just survive the upheaval and possibly even emerge stronger because of it. **

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_**Personal Interviews with Honey, Chika and Tamaki Suo**_

_**Questioner (now will be known as Q): Thank you all for being here today! I really appreciate it. **_

_**Tamaki: I was happy to come Q. No thanks are needed (gives a dazzling grin)**_

_**Honey: Um… Renge? Do I sob first or accuse Haru-chan of being unfaithful first? (Looks at paper, puzzled.) **_

_**Chika: I don't like these instructions (waves paper in the air) Honey gets better line than I do. **_

_**Honey: (sticks out his tongue) I'm older than you. So there. **_

_**Q: Honey! Chika! Stop arguing! And you weren't supposed to say my name! **_

_**Chika: Oh. Sorry. **_

_**Honey: Are we done yet? **_

_**Tamaki: Stop arguing you two! I didn't get my close up yet! **_

_**Honey: Tama-kun, this is a newspaper article. You don't get a close up. **_

_**Tamaki: What? (looks horrified) Where's my agent?**_

_**Chika: (shrugs) Kyoya said he has stuff to sell. Your gonna have to wing it. **_

_**Q: Riiighht. (clears throat) So… how do you feel about Haruhi?**_

_**Chika: (looks at paper) I think mother was cruel to have put us through such abas- abas- what does this word mean? **_

_**Q: Abasement. It means humiliation I think; Kyoya wrote it up. **_

_**Chika: (looks confused) Then why didn't it just say so?**_

_**Honey: I think Mommy was a meanie! (starts to sniffle) **_

_**Q: (sympathetic) I'm so sorry Honey… I had no idea…**_

_**Chika: But you helped write the script!**_

_**Q: (glared at him) **_

_**Chika: (ignoring Q) I mean, come on, Renge! Anyone can see those tears are fake! **_

_**Q: STOP SAYING MY NAME! **_

_**Tamaki: (whines) when will I get my close up? **_

_**Q:!$%$!#**_

_**(The rest of this conversation has been edited due to age restricted context) **_

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_This is a short chapter about Kyoya's new paper, which will as usual, bring him lots of money. I don't own Ouran High School Host Club but I do own the plot. Please review. Chapter five should be posted soon. _


	5. The Picnic Part Two

Mommy! Daddy! Chapter Five 

"Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!" Honey chimed, bouncing up to them and swing Haruhi's arm, "Ready to go Mommy?"

Chika also walked up, rubbing his head. "Did you have to hit me so hard?" he complained. Honey stuck his tongue out.

"Sure Honey," Haruhi answered, suddenly feeling shy as she remembered what she thought before. Honey, as happy as always, in his own little world, dragged her halfway down the stairs before he ditched her in favor of arguing with Chika.

"I beat you again," Honey boasted, "You have to work on your aim, Chika-kun. I didn't even have to dodge it."

"Only because I was going easy on you," the other boy replied, "Besides, how is it my fault if you can't dodge?"

"Take that back," Honey glared, "Or I'll tell Mommy."

"Make me," Chika taunted, "Unless you need Mommy to fight your battles for you?"

"Boys," Takashi warned, "Be quiet or you'll have a time out." Both fumed for a minute and then resumed arguing. They stepped into the stretch limo that was still idling on the driveway.

"Are they always like this?" Haruhi asked, watching the two boys bicker from the cool confines of the limo.

"Sometimes they're worse, I think," Takashi remarked, "Are you worried about something?"

"What do you mean?" Haruhi asked, startled.

"You bite your lip when you're thinking about something," Takashi informed her.

"Oh," Haruhi said quietly, falling into silence at the revelation. Mori didn't press her for any more details and for that Haruhi was grateful. Instead she turned her attention on her 'sons'.

"There's no way Darth Vader's scarier than Santa," Honey argued, "Santa could give you coal for Christmas!"

"But Darth Vader could kill you," Chika pointed out reasonably. Honey rolled his eyes at his brother's stupidity.

"With what?" he asked sarcastically, "The 'force'? Or the plastic, glowing light sabers? Besides, imagine no gifts _at all_."

"You're right," Chika gasped, horrified, "I might not get my authentic Japanese feudal era kunai! I had it on my Christmas list since January!" Honey nodded solemnly.

"And that's why Santa Claus will always be better than Darth Vader," Honey declared, "Because Darth Vader doesn't give out free stuff."

"So when will Satoshi arrive?" Haruhi asked them, smiling at the topic of their former debate, "And when will we arrive?"

"In ten minutes or so, I think," Honey shrugged and smiled his innocent- and what Haruhi was starting to believe was completely faked- grin, "As for Satoshi, he was in another city when I called him but told me he'd get there as soon as possible with a camera in hand. He laughed a lot."

Mori groaned and said, "Did you _have_ to invite Satoshi?"

Honey shrugged again and grinned, "All family's invited, even the ones who've lost all pretense of sanity. But he said he'd be a little late. He needed to buy a late wedding gift first."

"A wedding gift," Haruhi choked out, "Honey, Takashi and I are not married." Honey's eyes widened and filled with tears.

"So it's true," Honey sniffled, "Chika and I are really illegitimate?"

"Its okay, Honey-kun," Chika patted his brother's arm and looked at the stunned parents with accusing eyes, "I can't believe you would keep such an important thing from us! I trusted you and you lied to us for so long."

"Chika, we only started being your parents since this morning," Haruhi pointed out, "Since you tried to murder Honey before school. It's only been a few hours!"

"Five hours of cruel lying," Chika sobbed, "You betrayed us Mother!"

"Does that mean you never loved us, Mommy?" Honey asked tearfully, "Will you send us to the orphanage now?"

"Oh for god's sake," Haruhi exclaimed, "You two sound like your acting from one of Renge's dramatic plays!"

"Well…" Honey began and the boys exchanged a look.

"That is to say…" Chika added sheepishly.

Haruhi groaned and said, "Who was it?"

"Um… Kyoya?" Honey admitted weakly, "He thought a family fight would get more publicity and bring lots of customers to the Host Club. It was one of his better ideas actually."

"I knew it," Haruhi moaned and slapped a palm to her head, "Only Kyoya could be such a manipulative, greedy, as-"she caught sight of the boy's widened eyes and fixed herself, "amazing businessman. Only Kyoya would be such an amazing businessman."

"Were you about to curse Kyoya-kun mommy?" Honey asked sweetly, widening his golden brown eyes.

"Because if you are, I know a lot of good ones," Chika added proudly.

"That's not really necessary," Haruhi said hurriedly, "I was not cursing Kyoya."

"If you say so, mommy," Honey said doubtfully before he suddenly brightened, "That reminds me mommy, I have something for you and daddy!"

"What is it?" Takashi asked curiously, a smile still tugging on his lips from the aforementioned Kyoya. Honey fished around one of the picnic baskets before he pulled out a slice of lemon cake and a rumpled up paper. He handed he paper to Takashi and then started munching of his goodie, Chika watching him enviously from the corner.

Both parents stared at the paper, socked, as they read down the list.

_**To: Haruhi Fujioka and Takashi Morinozuka**_

_**From: The Honinozuka Family**_

_**We have recently been informed that you will be stepping in as our children's 'parents' for the remainder of our trip. While we have not have had the pleasure of meeting Ms. Fujioka, our son, Honey, has assured us that you are a very responsible young lady. Takashi, however, we are acquainted with and have full faith in his sanity (despite all evidence pointing otherwise) As such, we have enclosed instruction son how to properly meet Honey and Chika's needs. **_

_**Honey's schedule**_

_**6:00-7:30 Wake up and practice at the dojo. Kendo, karate and the personal Honinozuka family method only. **_

_**7:30-8:00 Breakfast should consist of only two cakes. Do not allow Honey to wheedle more from you. **_

_**8:00-3:00 Attend Ouran High School **_

_**3:00-4:30 Nap time with Usa-chan**_

_**4:30-6:00 Host Club and then complete homework.**_

_**6:00-8:00 World Domination! Please, make sure he's home before dark. He can enslave the human race while he's brushing his teeth. **_

_**8:00-9:00 Dinner and than bed time. Make sure he changes into pajamas before he goes to bed. **_

_**Honey's School Supplies**_

_**A pencil case with a dozen well sharpened pencils and boney erasers**_

_**A snack box, consisting of cookies, strawberry cake, cupcakes…**_

_**Assorted notebooks and materials needed for school. **_

_**Usa-chan: his pink bunny**_

_**A dozen razor sharp shurikans in a pink velvet pouch dotted with silver bunnies.**_

_**A couple thousand yen for lunch money**_

_**A bodyguard aka Takashi **_

_**Family Rules **_

_**One: Honey is only allowed five cakes per day and none of them are to be layered cakes. **_

_**Two: Chika is not allowed to ship his older brother out of the country. **_

_**Three: Or send him to boarding school. **_

_**Four: Or lock him in a closet. **_

_**Five: Honey and Chika should not be allowed in a room together unsupervised. **_

_**Six: Always finish your homework before bed. **_

_**Seven: Never allow dessert before dinner. **_

_**Eight: No deadly weapons outside of the dojo. Shurikans and steak knives are the exception. **_

_**Nine: Do not allow Honey to perform any illegal tasks. **_

_**Ten: Chika requires mandatory audiences with his teacher twice a week. **_

_**Eleven: Under no circumstances should Usa-chan be placed in the wash. **_

_**Twelve: Jelly beans do not fulfill the boy's daily quota for vegetables. Do not allow Honey or Chika to convince you otherwise.**_

"Please tell me your kidding," Haruhi said, reading the rest of the message.

"I'm afraid not," Chika sighed, "Jelly beans apparently aren't actual beans. This is stupid because the candy stores say they're beans. It's totally false advertising."

"Not the jelly beans," Takashi explained, "The list."

"They make sense to me," Honey answered, and looked out the window, "Look mommy we're here! Let's go!" Before his 'mommy' could answer, Honey pushed open the door and scrambled out, a grin on his face. With a happy exclamation, Chika quickly followed and the boy's laughingly began chasing each other around the leafy green park.

"Honey! Chika!" Haruhi cried out, exasperated, as she also ran out the door and chased after her 'sons', "Be careful!" The boys mistakenly took this for a game and kept running through, weaving beneath the slender trunks of trees as Haruhi followed them.

"_Why am I not surprised_?" Mori thought as he watched this, smiling. He rose from the limo seat in one quick, fluid motion, and brought out the picnic baskets. He stashed them underneath a close by tree and instructed the driver to come back in a few hours. Than he turned and followed his family toward the lake.

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"There! I got you!" Haruhi cried out in triumph, as her hands managed to grab one of Honey's pale, slender wrists and pull him to a stop, "Now never do that again Honey! You could have gotten lost or kidnapped!"

"But there's no one here but us," Chika pointed out, gasping a little as he came to a stop now that Haruhi won. The female Host looked around in surprise and just noticed that the park was totally abandoned… except for them.

"Where is everyone?" Haruhi asked in confusion. This was such a beautiful place, full of blooming cherry blossom trees and tall red ferns against the sparkling azure lake. Vivid flowers dotted the park in small clumps, their small petals reaching up to the golden white sunlight pouring down from the cloudless blue sky.

The only thing missing was all the people and on such a lovely day too? Unless… "Don't tell me this is a private park?" Haruhi nearly groaned. Honey smiled up at her innocently.

"Our family owns it!" he chirped, "Really mommy, you should be used to the special but totally unnecessary privileges that come with being rich by now. You're a member of the Host Club!"

"Damn rich bastards," Haruhi mumbled, shaking her head before a thought suddenly came to her and she moaned, "And two of the richest bastards are my sons. How did I get to this?"

"Well we turned left on the highway interstate, and made a right turn after five miles," Chika mentioned, helpfully, "Then we went through the main Taka Sámi road and came here."

"So she found out?" Mori asked, making Haruhi jump as she turned and saw ho silently the tall teen had walked up to them. She narrowed her doe eyes at him and pouted.

"You knew?" she accused him, "And you didn't tell me?" Mori appeared unruffled.

"Of course," he answered, "It's mine after all."

"Can we go swimming now then mommy?" Chika asked, giving her a sweet smile, "Pretty please?" Honey took his little brother's lead and gave an equally irresistible smile.

"With strawberries on top?" he added. Haruhi nearly melted under such a cute yet diabolically evil onslaught but like any good mother, she stayed firm.

"We just came here," she protested, "And you two disobeyed me and went running."

"But the water's so pretty," Honey pleaded, casting a longing glance at the cool lake, "Please?"

Haruhi paused, desperately trying to give herself a good reason to not break down in front of her adorably manipulative sons. She was so busy thinking that she didn't see Mori sneak up to stand behind her. Neither did she see the wink he sent the two boys before he pushed her into the lake.

Haruhi slipped through the water with a gasp, and came up spluttering, her dark curls pasted on against her forehead. "W-what did you…? Mori!" The boys burst into laughter, Chika holding on desperately to his brother to not completely fall over on giggles. Even Mori had a faint smile on his face as Haruhi glared at them.

A minute later though, even she had to see the humor in the situation and despite her better judgment, a small giggle slipped out. "Well you might as well come in," she allowed, grinning as Chika and Honey both jumped into the water without a second thought. She splashed some water at her sons in payback and Chika ducked before splashing her back.

A few minutes of aimless water bursting everywhere, Haruhi swam over to the side of the lake where Mori was sitting and watching them. Chika and Honey stared there own miniature water battle in the lake as Haruhi looked on.

"Aren't you going to come into the water?" she asked, smiling up at him.

"I don't feel like swimming," he said, shrugging. If he had looked closer, he would have seen the glimmer of playful mischief in his wife's beautiful doe brown eyes.

"Help me up then?" she asked sweetly. Without hesitation, Mori stood p and reached down to help her up. A second layer a fourth splash signaled in the water as Haruhi pulled him in.

"I'm going to get you for that," Mori exclaimed, shocked but amused as Chika and Honey turned to see what the commotion was about.

"You'll have to catch me first!" Haruhi said, over her shoulder, as she dived into the water and started swimming away. Mori laughed and followed her, unknowingly making Haruhi shiver as the deep, rich sound came toward her ears.

The next several minutes came with Mori trying to catch Haruhi, with rather less than successful results. The tall, lithe girl was a surprisingly good swimmer, bending through the water, with an innate grace and barely a ripple as she cut through the lake. After that, a massive battle ensued, with Mori and Chika facing the formidable duo of Honey and Haruhi in an epic battle of the seas… err, lake.

"So," an amused voice interrupted, and Haruhi looked up to see the smirking form of what was undoubtedly Satoshi, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your lovely wife, bro?"

Mori groaned and looked at Haruhi with a resigned expression, "I still swear he was adopted."

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_**OK, so I know this took a long time and I guess have no excuse other than pure laziness. (and Canadian people but I don't think that'll go over so well) No flames people, I already know it took a while to post. **_


	6. Satoshi

Mommy! Daddy! Chapter Six

Satoshi was undoubtedly Takashi-sempai's brother, Haruhi noted. The tall frame, broad shoulders, and straight ink black hair proved that. The carefree, open grin though was a certain rarity.

She stayed back as Honey and Chika rushed to greet the teen, chattering excitedly about all they had done as they hugged him, despite the fact that they were drenched. Takashi too seemed to enjoy having his brother here despite his earlier complaints and Haruhi had to hide a smile as he got up and also gave his brother a warm greeting.

"Emotionless automaton, intimidating height, scary glance… yep, I missed you big brother!" Satoshi laughed, and returned his brother's hug. Than his eyes turned to see Haruhi and a quick sweep of those surprisingly piercing dark assessed her before he smiled.

"Now who is this lovely lady?" Satoshi asked slyly, giving his brother a teasing smirk, "Hiding something from me, bro? Like, how much money you had to pay to get that goddess over there to pretend to be your girlfriend?"

"We're just friends actually," Haruhi laughed, and held out her hand, "It's nice to meet you."

"I assure you madam; if I knew Takashi had such beautiful lady friends I would have visited a lot more," Satoshi leaned down to press a kiss on her palm and Haruhi shook her head in exasperation, strangely at ease with this down-to-Earth, free-spirited Morinozuka brother.

"This is gross," Chika announced, while Honey had a calculating look on his face. A look that was quickly replaced by a sweet smile when he saw that his 'parents' were looking.

"And how are my newfound nephews?" Satoshi asked amicably, settling himself comfortably against the ground, "That reminds me… why I was never invited to your wedding?"

"Well for one, we're not married," Mori answered, "And if we were, you would _not _be there."

"So you _are_ getting married?" Satoshi asked innocently, and Chika stifled a chuckle. Haruhi felt her cheeks blush a deep red and even Mori looked uncomfortable as Satoshi waited for them to answer.

"Mommy and daddy finally decided to marry after having made us illegitimate," Honey explained, "It was awful, Uncle Satoshi. For a whole day, people were staring at us and being all sympathetic and giving me free cake that wasn't even strawberry…" He began to tear up.

"Aw, it's alright," Satoshi comforted, and then glared at Mori, "How could you have kids without marrying this girl Mori? I thought mom and dad raised you better than that! At least you're marrying her _now_."

"We're not getting married," Mori said, exasperated, and Haruhi felt a strange flutter in her chest as he refused. Why was she so nervous? Satoshi raised an eyebrow and immediately jumped up.

"We need to have a brother to brother talk for a minute," he explained to a confused Haruhi, Honey and Chika before forcefully dragging Mori to a clump of trees nearby.

"Why are you bringing me here?" Mori asked as Takashi whirled to face him.

"Are you insane?" Satoshi said incredulously, gesturing at the slender, dark haired girl standing by the lake, "Look at her! A girl like that isn't going to come every day you know. You have the perfect excuse to get close to her, as she's your 'wife' and you do nothing! If that's not bad enough, you even expose her to surprisingly gorgeous, and fairly charming, rich young men with experience at making girls fall madly in love with them! Are you gay or blind!"

"I don't feel about Haruhi that way," Mori insisted, even when Satoshi gave him a look of disbelief, "I know she's pretty and smart and kind but really, she's more Tamaki's type and I have to protect Honey…"

"That sounds stupid even to me," Satoshi snorted, "You're head over heels even if you haven't realized it yet. You have to ask her out!"

"I can't do that!" Mori protested quickly, "It will ruin everything; she's my friend and-"

"And you want to grab her and snog her senseless?" his brother suggested, "How can you do this to me bro? You're so selfish! How many other chances will I get to have such a pretty and kind sister-in-law? Think of me for a change!"

"Satoshi you're impossible," Mori groaned, but considered it, "I don't know. I guess I kind of like her as more than a friend…" Satoshi didn't need any more encouragement.

"So Operation Make Haruhi Fall in Love is in action!" his brother exclaimed happily, before grabbing him and dragging him to the small laughing group again.

"So," Satoshi said, in a tone entirely too familiar to the Hitachiin brothers for Haruhi's sense of comfort, "You two crazy kids have been working so hard raising Honey and Chika and all! You know, the terrible twos, the something threes, the know-it-all fours… so you two need a bit of R&R. Don't you think?"

He didn't give them a chance to answer and still continued his happy spiral, "So I'll just take my nephews here… give you a little alone time, have fun, don't do anything I wouldn't do, etc. etc." Satoshi grabbed on to Honey and Chika's hands but was too slow because Haruhi came to concept with it pretty quickly.

Whoever said dealing with Tamaki's stupid impulsiveness didn't have benefits was a dirty liar.

"I don't think that's a very good idea," Haruhi inserted hastily, giving a nervous look in Mori's direction.

"Actually mommy," Honey spoke up, "I don't think it's working out; you should start seeing other children. It's not you, it's me, well really it's you, but it was great while it lasted…"

"It's not that we don't love you mom," Chika added, "We just need a break now and then. Bye." And before either of their stunned parents could have a chance to argue otherwise, the small boys grabbed their equally manipulative uncle, waved goodbye, grabbed their picnic boxes, and basically deserted their parents in the middle of the park.

"Um… what just happened?" Haruhi asked, still looking at the place where her sons were standing just a minute ago.

"Satoshi took our kids AND our lunch," Mori said indignantly, "A bowl of my favorite Ramen noodles were in there!"

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	7. Mori's House

Mommy! Daddy! Chapter Seven

"So do we go after them?" Haruhi asked, still a bit nonplussed from the entire ordeal. Satoshi was certainly… original. If they didn't look so alike, than the female Host might seriously consider Takashi's claims of not being related to him.

Said husband looked to be considering the suggestion, "Well, they couldn't have gotten that far away with the picnic basket. If we're quick, we might- Ow! What was that for?"

"For not caring about your kids as much as you do for a picnic," was the prompt response as Takashi rubbed his head indignantly.

"There was fancy tuna in there, you know," her 'husband' replied, slightly put out.

Haruhi paused. "…Fancy tuna?" doe shaped eye blinked in wonder, "Which direction do you think they left in?"

"I suppose it doesn't matter," Takashi said, "They probably managed to run off by now."

"Takashi," Haruhi began, suddenly noting with a startlingly fast skip of her heart that she was alone in the forest with Mori, "Why are you being so talkative now?"

"I'm not sure," Takashi, admitted, with an apologetic shake of his head, "I think it's mainly because you're easy to talk to and you never seem to judge anything a I choose to say."

Haruhi let a soft smile cover her face, "Thank you," she answered quietly.

"You're shivering," Takashi noted, with no small amount of distress. Indeed, the younger Host was definitely quivering slightly from the cold. It was a relatively warm day, but the recent dip and subsequent pick of the winds, tended to make goose bumps rise.

"I'll be fine," Haruhi protested, not very well judging by the thin line that Takashi's mouth took.

"You'll get a cold," he said firmly, and then walked over to their small stash of belongings by the lake to pick up his jacket, "You didn't bring yours so you should borrow mine for now."

"But you might get a cold," Haruhi protested quickly, but accept the proffered jacket and slipped it over her shoulders. It was several sizes too big but fell over her comfortingly, wide enough that the sleeves draped over her arms by a few inches but not so big that it became smothering. The smooth cotton of the school jacket still had hints of its wearers own dusky, natural scent, so unlike the other boy's expensive colognes.

Takashi shrugged, "I'm not bothered by it as much as you, and besides, there's a small property within the park estate for overnight stays. There's a small staff employed there and they'll probably have anything we'll need."

Haruhi nodded and followed the older teen as he expertly crossed the field, acting quite as if he owned the place. Which, in retrospect, Haruhi thought wryly, he did. It was mainly quiet but when Takashi saw her admiring some of the more vibrant plant life on their walk, he gave short yet useful descriptions of each of the flora. She was rather surprised by how knowledgeable he was of it all really.

Nevertheless, it shouldn't have been that shocking either: Takashi was both an excellent student with a knack for scientific, Latin names, and a wealthy nature lover with a wide variety of grounds to explore. It should have been expected that he knew his way around.

It wasn't long before they reached the house- which was really a small mansion- with three or four levels, a tiled feudal era styled roof, and bamboo walls. The staff was surprisingly quick about their welcome, immediately running to get them towels and prepare a meal. Much to Haruhi's surprise, they didn't even blink at the strange girl who arrived along with their boss, soaking wet nonetheless.

Then again, they'd probably met Tamaki.

"Um… miss?" a hesitant voice questioned and Haruhi looked up to meet the dark brown eyes of one of the maids, "Shall I show you to your room?"

"That would be perfect, thank you," Haruhi smiled at the other girl in relief, and followed the slender form up to what would apparently be her room, "May I ask what your name is?"

"Akane ma'am," the girl replied simply, as she opened a door to a room that was quite possibly the size of Haruhi's entire apartment back home, "Shall I take that for you?"

She gestured to the jacket currently draped over Haruhi's still slightly damp form. Haruhi's fingers pressed against the fabric reluctantly as she pulled up a smile, "Oh, no thank you. I'll be fine."

"Of course ma'am," Akane replied courteously, her eyes no doubt tracking the possessive clutching of Haruhi's hand, "Shall I get you a change of clothes then, ma'am? The bath has already been drawn for your use and a meal shall be ready shortly."

"Um… yes, thank you," Haruhi mumbled, releasing her grip somewhat and feeling a bit unsettled by the respectful tone of a girl probably a few years her senior, "Can you call me Haruhi?"

"Of course ma'… Haruhi," the girl replied, her face looking surprised as the wide, open smile she received in return. Akane then quickly blanked her features again, gave a short bow, and made her way out the spacious room.

Her manager certainly had… intriguing friends.

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_**If anyone decides to kill me after reading this than I have a decent excuse- er, explanation, I swear! Well actually… I've got nothing,. *sheepish shrug* I've been lazy and neglectful of this story and my readers and I should apologize for that. The only thing I can say is: Sorry? Followed by a "Please Don't Kill Me!" I don't know if I want to continue this story so I'm giving a heads up now: I may not return to add on to this plot line. **_


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